.: Top 10 Signs You'll Soon Be Unemployed :.

1. You return from a week's vacation to find that you had scheduled THIS week as vacation, not last week.

2. The email in which you wittily described your boss as “Hitler without the redeeming features” was accidentally cc'd to “All Staff”.

3. That cute new employee you unsuccessfully hit on turns out to be head of the Lesbian Lawyers Alliance AND the chairman's daughter.

4. You wake up naked under the boardroom table just as the door opens and the directors file in.

5. Arriving at your destination on a business trip, you check your papers and discover that you have gone to the wrong continent.

6. The milk you “borrowed” from the company fridge in the R and D department wasn't milk and no one will tell you what it was.

7. The bad driver to whom you gave the one finger sign on your way to the office turns out to be the new director of human resources.

8. You take a "sick" day because you were up most of the night watching a TV sports final and the following morning the boss says, "So, I hear you had a late night?"

9. An off-color joke you forwarded to “All staff” contained a Trojan super-virus which shut down company computers worldwide.

10. After your project team gets the company listed on the stock market, you realize that your data had the decimal point in the wrong place.